Blues of the Cheese and Emotional Variety.

Depression comes and goes. It strikes when we are most vulnerable. I've heard of people who are too depressed to eat. I have never been so lucky. My melancholy generally invites peanut butter and cheese over for a big giant pity party.

During these times when I'd rather sleep the world away or hide in my apartment until the landlords kick me out on my ass I must remember that there are a few natural elements that are good for my soul and my body. I speak of sunshine. As hard as it may be to walk outside, once I'm out there and the sun hits my eyes I feel as though I should be doing something.

I run until I can only walk. I walk until the sweat stings my eyes and I'm crying like a fool. I cry and run and walk and sweat and the great thing is, no one else can tell the difference between me being red-faced from sobbing and me being red-faced from sweating. It's cathartic. The sweat releases my fears and frustration. The sun forces me to look at the beauty around me. By the time I come back home I am physically and emotionally exhausted. If I do lapse back into a heap on the couch with a peanut butter sandwich, at least I have earned it.

We all have "fuck my life" moments. We all have days, months, even years when we think it can't get any worse. Suck it up, cupcake. Nobody said it would be easy.

Now go the fuck outside.